At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
