Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
What a dumb baby whore.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
