it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
