I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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