Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
