OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
