love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Randomize
