This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
