So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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