i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
After tacos, we're chasing women.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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