2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
