yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
