thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
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