Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
