He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize