let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
