Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize
