Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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