She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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