I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
