margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
