An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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