I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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