no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
