I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
