I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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