what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
