i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
