Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I touched a dick in church today
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
