addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
