bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
