god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
