i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
