ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize