are you so shy because you have an std?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
