I want to walk on stilts...naked
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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