cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
MIDGETS
????
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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