mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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