you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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