doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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