seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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