would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Randomize