hotel room ftw
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
