He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
