Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
