Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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