Yo dont text me then not text me
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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