Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
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