I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
