And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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