Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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